Another day, another dog fight

Her Majesty and I were in the elevator yesterday, going out to pee. We go out to pee very frequently these days, on account of her new obsession with pissing on her bed.

Anyway. The elevator stops on an intermediate floor, and a guy gets in. Then, Thor gets in.

Thor is an SPCA dog, I'm not sure if he's still being fostered or if his foster human adopted him. In any case, the SPCA identified him as a "pitbull cross". Because the SPCA here knows a total of five breeds: pitbull, shepherd, lab, shitzu and bichon. In reality Thor looks absolutely nothing like any of the above. He looks exactly like a Brittany spaniel, though a little larger. Like maybe 60 lbs instead of 40. But then, many dogs grow way larger than their breed standards. In any case, Thor looks like a big burly Brittany spaniel. And he's quite a personable creature, but he must have got into a dog fight before because every time his human sees another dog, she freaks out and wrestles Thor away. I don't think that's the best way to socialise him, really, but nobody asked for my opinion.

In any case, Thor was loose in the hallway while his human did who knows what, and he ran into the elevator and straight to Her Majesty, and pinned her in the corner. I don't think he had any hostile intentions, but Tinky-Winky freaked out on him, of course, so immediately it sounds like a major dog fight is going on. And I don't care for dogs freaking out Her Majesty, so I immediately grabbed him by the scruff with both hands (good thing there was no room for him to maneuver in the elevator) and yanked him away. The guy who had just got in the elevator took over, and between the two of us, we got him out of the elevator just as fast as he got in.

The funny thing is, Her Majesty obviously didn't see that we humans manhandled Thor out the door, so she figured she had scared him away with her Mighty Jaws of Death, and she was thoroughly pleased with the whole adventure. I don't think he even touched her, really, much less did her any harm.

But the moral is, if you get a dog, you should learn to break up a dog fight. Once upon a time when I used to read other dog owners' blogs, before I got aggravated with the Carebear ignorance of it all, all the dog owners who read each other's blogs freaked out over some dog fight that got in the news, and tried to brainstorm what to do in case your dog is attacked. One of them had once scared a dog off by waving a clipboard, but the others had no idea whatsoever. So again, here is how you break up a dog fight: use your prehensile hands to grab one or both dogs, and separate them. Seriously. Don't stand there screaming. Don't pull on the losing dog's leash. Just grab the dogs and separate them. Typically the safest place to grab a fighting dog is the tail or a hind leg, away from the toothy end. But if one dog has locked his jaw on the other, then you grab the jaws and pry them open. Srsly. Never mind freaking out and waving your clipboard.

I am not amused

A dog bit me.

Her Majesty and I were in the Community Garden. I was chatting with a friend, and Her Majesty was lying in the shadow of the car, keeping cool. Then, two people approached with a loose dog, and they came into the garden to look at something. The dog saw Her Majesty and approached her with an aggressive posture, so I went to intervene. Her Majesty didn't get up but was visibly tense and on her guard. I put my hand on her back and tried to push the other dog away. Instead it went around me to go sniff Tinky-Winky's butt.

Tinky-Winky got up and started growling while I kept pushing the dog and telling it to slag off. It continued to stand aggressively and refused to move away. Finally Tinky-Winky gave a warning snap and that ugly cur laid into her. Luckily (I guess), since they were right in my feet, I was able to pick up Her Majesty fairly quickly and get her out of the other dog's reach before she got bitten. But as I was doing that, the nasty creature turned and bit me on the leg. And even after that, it kept refusing to move away, but stood pushing back as I tried to push it away with my leg, and stared at me menacingly. While its idiot owner (who happens to be an offspring of the idiot boss of the job I just quit) simply called it a couple of times, making no effort whatsoever to come and control her mutt despite the fact that obviously it doesn't come when called and it just got into a fight. Bitch... and I don't mean the dog.

Seriously, what the fuck? Your dog started a fight and bit someone and you don't even bother to come over and control it? I know I've been guilty of letting my dog off-leash when she couldn't be trusted not to get into a fight, but a) my dog has never bitten a person and b) if a fight starts I run to break it up. What a rotten family...

The more I know people, the more I love my dog.

Tinky-Winky's new best friend

Ever since Carter died, I figured Otis would be Tinky-Winky's new best friend, since he was her second-best friend before. Otis lives in our building and is a really sweet, quite large dog. Everybody loves him... except, of course, Her Majesty. When we first met Otis, the Creature was in her snapping-at-noses phase, so she would snap at his nose. Otis would leap out of the way, and then try again. So over time, this became a game. Otis pokes his nose at her, she makes a show of snapping, he makes a show of leaping out of the way. They find this hilarious. Now that Tinky-Winky is in a new phase of saying hello like a polite dog, Otis is rather disappointed that she won't play his game anymore.

But as it turns out, Tinky-Winky's new favourite dog is not Otis, but this handsome fellow:


Too bad he looked away, but oh well. You can see he's a quite large male pitbull. Intact, at that. His name is Diesel.

Now if you're very obsessive about reading this blog, you may remember that the first time we met Diesel, he was being handled by a small girl who had no control over him, and I found the whole thing alarming. Since then, I've heard many anecdotes of Diesel being aggressive to other dogs in the building. Now I'm not saying that aggression is ok when a small dog like Tinky-Winky does it, but the redeeming quality of Her Majesty is that you can overpower her easily, and she has less capacity to inflict serious damage than a 100-lb dog. A dog like Diesel can't afford to be aggressive, or he's gonna meet an untimely demise. (For the record, there came a time in my early days with Tinky-Winky when I wondered whether she wasn't heading towards euthanasia herself.)

All this to say, when Her Majesty and I came face to face with Diesel and his human in the woods, I thought there might be trouble. The other human (the alpha male in Diesel's pack, who does in fact control him and does obedience work with him) and I each restrained our mutts, and then we let them have a look at each other.


This is not the first thing that happened. What happened first, of all things, is that Tinky-Winky wagged her tail and went to sniff Diesel's butt.

???????????

That has never happened. She's learned to tolerate being sniffed, and she's even taken, quite recently, to wagging her tail at other dogs, but I had never, ever, to that point, seen her make friendly overtures and take the initiative for butt-sniffing. And here, of course, Diesel returns the compliment.

Then:


They're perfectly friendly. No snapping took place at any point. No growling. No aggression. Somehow, the two fightingest dogs in the building immediately hit it off as Best Friends Forever. I tells ya, you could have knocked me down with a feather.

Maybe her heart grew three sizes?

If you've been following this blog (and at least 29 of you are), you're aware by now that Tinky-Winky used to have a problem with aggression, but she's getting better all the time. On Sunday we were walking off-leash in the afternoon, seeing as the Bylaw guy got fed up with the stupidity of our town council and is no longer doing anything about the dogs, or anything else, that I can tell. The town council doesn't want to enforce anything because it's either "too much work" or "contrary to our northern culture". Anyway, the fact that the mayor and four out of seven councillors are morons is not the point, but thanks to their stupidity, we can now walk off-leash whenever we want. In fact, there are more off-leash dogs downtown in the middle of the day than there used to be before we hired the bylaw guy.

Have I mentioned yet that the mayor and four out of seven councillors are morons?

So back to my story, we were walking off-leash in broad daylight, and coming opposite on the trail was the town hall clerk (probably the last person in town who believes in the dog bylaw) and her two on-leash dogs, Dexter (a pug) and Freddie (a Boston terrier, or French bulldog - I can never remember). Tinky-Winky has previously done some social peeing with Dexter. Freddie is new. Both have a habit of freaking out at oncoming traffic when on leash.

So. Freddie, Dexter and their person face off with Tinky-Winky on the trail. I tried to call her back. She thought about it, while Freddie and Dexter barked at her, and their person pondered her next moved. Luckily, she's not the kind to freak out when dogs start barking, and also she's aware that her dogs have behavioural problems, so she doesn't let them go after someone else's dog and then blame the other person. So, nobody panicked.

Tinky-Winky went off the trail and around the dogs peacefully, sniffed their tracks, and waited for me.

Attagirl!!!


Today, as we were exiting the building for our evening walk, someone else was walking in carrying laundry and followed by two off-leash dogs. Or more specifically, if I'm not mistaken, two off-leash bitches. We've met them before, though I don't know their names. Sounds Hawaiian, or something. One is an adult, somewhat reminiscent of an Irish setter but a bit taller and bulkier, and a different coat. She's had her nose bit by Tinky-Winky before. The other one is a puppy, and not a very old one. I think maybe four months. She's about the same height as Tinky-Winky already, but lanky, like the big one. Unlike the big one, though, she's normally smarter than to tangle with my Wolverine.

Anyway. We're exiting the building as they're entering, so we're all in the air space between the two doors together. The big one followed the person into the building. The puppy, for some reason, decided to get all over Tinky-Winky. Seriously all over her. She stuck her nose in Tinky-Winky's ears, smelled her lips repeatedly, smelled her butt, with lots of body contact. Tinky-Winky was sitting and I had my hand on her collar, but I actually wasn't restraining her. She didn't even look mad. I have seriously never seen her half that close to another dog. Even when she doesn't fight, she'll still bite the nose off any dog who tries to sniff her butt, let alone her ears.

After a while she did give one half-arsed little snap, not even close to hitting the puppy. The puppy's person pulled her away, but then the big dog must have thought something like "oh, you're sniffable now?" So she ran back out the door to sniff Tinky-Winky, too. And Tinky-winky didn't freak out.

There is no way Tinky-Winky doesn't freak out at a hyper, large, probably female dog jumping all over her. But she didn't.


I think my dog is a lot less messed-up than everyone thinks.

Predacon: terrorize

Recently, Tinky-Winky has taken to sleeping on my bed of her own free will. In the past she would usually sleep under the bed, or only sleep on the bed when I put her there. The last few weeks, she waits for me to make the hide-a-bed, then she jumps up and sprawls out right in the middle. And of course, laterally across the bed rather than length-wise so we could both lie down comfortably.

Two nights ago, apparently, she was in a hurry, so she jumped up when I still had two blankets to add. Hmmmm... Oh well. I put the next blanket over her and waited for her to crawl out.

And waited.

Her Majesty sat up, still under the blanket, and turned her head this way and that, but didn't move her butt.

I waited a while longer.

She still didn't move her butt.

Fine.

I pulled the blanket off her head. Immediately she lay down again and went to sleep. Laterally across the bed, of course. She looked adorable.

Later, as I tried to fit my fat arse onto the tiny sliver of bed she left me, she put her little paws over her little nose and squeezed.

It looked even more adorable.

That's funny. She could crush all the bones in my hand with her teeth. She could rip out my trachea before I could even blink. And she looks completely adorable while preventing me from getting into my own bed.

We think we're so smart, but really dogs are playing us all for the fools we are.

Shibas don't recall, eh?

That's the biggest myth about shibas: that they don't recall. Maybe your shiba doesn't recall, but shibas as a breed are perfectly capable of it. But like I always say, it's a matter of motivation, and if your dog isn't getting off-leash time, it's certainly not gonna be motivated to come back when it gets loose.

Anyway. All this to say, I have an anecdote. I think it was Friday morning on our off-leash walk, the Evil Giant Chihuahua and its person came out of their house somewhere ahead of us. This freaked me out, because the human uses a walker. If Tinky-Winky gets into a fight with a regular dog, well, that's one thing. But what if she got into a fight with this man's dog, and he tried to intervene and fell? At best, he'd be rightfully upset, at worst he might really hurt himself. And since the Evil Giant Chihuahua likes to antagonize Tinky-Winky, a fight seemed probable.

Uh-oh.

At this point, Tinky-Winky was behind me, so I called her. She could see that I had the leash in my hand (as opposed to around my neck as I do when just carrying it) so she knew I was gonna leash her up. So she sauntered past me well out of my reach, until she saw ahead of her the Evil Giant Chihuahua. She stopped and looked at me. Then at the chihuahua. Then at me. I kept calling her, still with the leash in my hand. She looked back and forth between me and the chihuahua for a while, and then she made her decision. She got her big shiba smile on her face and ran back to me. Not past me as she likes to do to show obedience to the letter of my command while ignoring the spirit of it. No, she ran right to me, stopped, and waited to be leashed up.

When we resumed walking, what happened next is that the Evil Giant Chihuahua wiggled out of its harness and came running at us, snarling and barking. I stopped, held Tinky-Winky by her collar, and tried to grab the chihuahua. This is part of why Tinky-Winky is willing to come to me when there is another dog: because I'm going to handle the other dog. She knows this. She knows it's better to let me do it than to fight the other dog herself. If I recalled her and then tried to force her to "make friends" with the other dog, she'd never come. So here I am holding my dog with one hand and trying to catch this psychotic chihuahua with the other hand, and the dog's person abandonned his walker and came running after his dog, to the best of his ability, which is exactly what I had feared in the first place. Technically, now that it's his dog off-leash and not mine, I'm at least free of liability, but that doesn't change the fact that I don't want this man falling or getting hurt. Luckily, he did neither. He was able to grab his dog, and then walk safely back to his walker, and continue his stroll.

Just to be sure, though, I didn't let Tinky-Winky off the leash again as I normally would after passing another dog. I just didn't want to take a chance while the man was out there. So, she lost about a quarter of her off-leash walk that day for being a good dog. But she didn't even ask me to let her loose again. That's the great thing we have that I think many dogs are missing: trust. She trusts me to take good care of her, and I trust her to be a responsible little dog.

So yes, shibas recall. They just have to want to.

Dog fight versus posturing

You know, I've discovered that most people have no idea what a dog fight looks like. One guy who poses as some kind of expert on the web stated once that a normal dog fight is just a bunch of snarling and snapping, and only pitbulls grab and hold on to another dog.

Riiiiiiight...

In that case, my dog is a pitbull, and that doesn't explain how she's a champion, daughter, mother and grandmother of champions, and all of them as shiba inu and not pitbull. Got all them judges fooled for generations!

No, seriously though, all dogs fight the same way: attack, grab something (preferrably the jugular), hold on until death or the other guy says "uncle".

I know this because when Tinky-Winky came to live with me, her breeder told me that this is a breed renowned for being agressive to other dogs, that the bitches are especially agressive, and that this is the most agressive shiba bitch she, the breeder, has ever seen in her life. In fact, the conditions of getting her at all were that I wouldn't let her get fat, and I'd work on her behaviour.

In the beginning, obviously, I never let her off the leash. Other dogs running off leash would come running up to us and I'd tell the other owner "call off your dog" and they'd say "oh don't worry, he's friendly!"

Right. Actually, your dog isn't friendly, he's rude; but that's not even what I'm worried about.

Tinky-Winky would attack so fast you didn't have time to blink. Unlike other dogs who go into a frenzy of barking, she wouldn't make a sound. If I had looked at her rather than the oncoming dog, I suppose her body posture would have been threatening, but she never barked, just attacked. I'd always think "next time I'll pick her up before she can attack"; but the next time she'd still always be too fast for me. She was fast and she was deadly accurate, too. She would hit right at the jugular, no matter how small or large a dog. And she attacked some pretty large dogs. She's always had a special hatred of retrievers, for some reason, but she's also fought Belgian shepherds, boxers, an Am Staff terrier, two Doberman pinschers at once, and some malamute-like crosses we have in town. Always the same: strike for the jugular. The only way she would miss is if the other dog had a very heavy coat. More often, before you could even react, the other dog would be on the ground screaming in terror with this insane little creature clamped to its throat (except the Dobermans - they just screamed and ran). So believe me when I tell you, shibas do clamp their jaws and hang on. I've had to pry her jaws open a few times, and got bit twice doing it. If she had been any bigger, she'd probably have been put down as a vicious dog.

Six years later, you'd never know it. We walk past all kinds of dogs on the trail and she never says boo. Even with crazy little barking dogs. There is a pug who blows his top every time he sees an oncoming dog, and she totally ignores him. And yesterday something like a large chihuahua tried to attack us, and she ignored that too. Off leash, she's even better... 99% of the time. Almost always, if another dog is blocking her path, she'll come back to me, wait to leash up, and then walk calmly past the other dog. Over the winter, I got in the habit of carrying cheese in my pocket in a Ziploc bag; she recalls to the rustling of the Ziploc much better than to her name, let me tell you. Well one time a dog passed by and she started to stalk it with agressive body posture; I rustled the Ziploc and she came running back to me. So I can actually recall her from a fight she was about to start. You wouldn't know that's the same dog I had six years ago.

That being said, she's still not a "friendly" dog. First of all, that 1% of the time, or actually, more like 0.25% of the time, she'll attack a little dog. Just for the sake of attacking a little dog. She'll spot one from a distance and just go after it. She's done it twice in the last two years, but not in the last year. Maybe she's over it; maybe my strategy of not bringing her out when little foofy dogs are afoot has more to do with it. I just know I can't trust her with little dogs. (Actually, one of them is bigger than her, but he's got that little-dog behaviour.)

The other thing is, when she meets another dog, she doesn't tolerate bad manners. Normally she prefers to go around them and smell their wake after they're past her. If she actually interacts with another dog and the other dog approaches politely, she'll sniff noses, then butts, and then ignore it. If the other dog is "friendly", as people call it, that is, jumping all over her, she snaps at it. And that is where you can see that people have no idea what a dog fight looks like. Tinky-Winky will snap at their dog and clearly miss, so that there is literally a loud "snap" as her jaws shut. This isn't a miss. Tinky-Winky does not miss. In fact when she does this, she doesn't even lunge at the other dog. Just a snarl and a snap, and normally the other dog will back off. Occasionally, if the other dog is slow, it gets its nose nipped, but it's not her intention to bite another dog's nose. If it was, she'd have it by the nose every time and not let go. No, this is just a warning snap. And people get all freaked out and think she "attacked" their dog. Which is all the more unfair since their dog is the one being rude, and most of the time they've insisted on bringing it close to her so it can be extra, extra annoying.

So before you freak out thinking that dogs are "fighting", see if anyone's actually biting. When they're circling each other snapping and snarling, that's just trash talk. If they're actually fighting, it's a contact sport. There will be one angry trashing pile of biting dogs, not two or more separate dogs.

It's funny that we've had dogs for tens of thousands of years and people don't even know that.

Some people are so rude

In the neighbourhood where we're staying in Calgary, there is someone with a small bearded dog, like maybe a miniature schnauzer. I've only seen it at night, so it's hard to tell. Whatever it is, though, it's aggressive towards dogs.

So, as we're walking along today, Tinky-Winky and I saw that aggressive schnauzer thing coming the other way on its flexileash. And you know how we feel about flexileashes.

Tinky-Winky and I pulled over into a driveway to give them room to pass by. But the schnauzer came at my dog, barking and snarling. Still at the end of its flexileash. Ha. I'm sure Tinky-Winky is gonna take that kind of BS... NOT!!! She started barking and snapping too. I held her back and waited for the person and the schnauzer to walk by. Instead of which, the person stopped and pulled feebly at the leash. She didn't reel in her dog, she didn't talk to him with authority, she didn't simply walk by and pull him along. She stood there feebly while her dog tried to start a fight. If I had reacted the same way and let my dog go after hers, we'd have had a big fight on our hands.

In the end I had to pick up Tinky-Winky and carry her away from that annoying little rat. And his useless person.

Really, who does that? You're responsible for your dog. If it's trying to pick a fight, control it and get it away from others. Don't just stand there uselessly waiting for a fight to start.

And by the way, if your dog weighs less than about 40 lbs, PICK IT UP. Solves just about any problem you're having. Or however many pounds you can lift. Get a dog that weighs less than you can pick up off the ground, then you always have a way to control it.

Tinky-Winky makes friends with a pug

The difficulty with Tinky-Winky isn't so much that she's aggressive, but more that she's unpredictable. I would say 95% of the time, if she meets another dog off leash, she will come back to me and nothing happens. Out of the other 5%, some times she attacks like a demon, especially small dogs... and some times, as in this case, I find her peacefully having a pee on a rock with a pug. Of all things, you'd think she'd hate pugs? Not at all. Maybe she just doesn't realize they're dogs at all.

In any case, that's my problem with her. If she was always aggressive, she'd never be off leash, and if she was never aggressive, she'd never be on leash... but you never know with her. That's the problem.

The real problem is you. Again.

A while back, the What Kind of Dog Hunts crazy woman triumphantly "proved" that Cesar is evil. Thusly.

On one episode, Cesar dealt with a dog who would lash out when you try to groom him. Insert video of Cesar restraining the dog while continuing his calm assertive conversation with someone off-camera. Cesar then proceeds to solve the problem without using candy. The horror!

Meanwhile, another TV trainer whose name hasn't registered on my higher consciousness dealt with a dog who would lash out when you try to groom him. This candy-based trainer restrained the dog repeatedly, then took it to a groomer who had the same problem and did the same thing: restrained the dog. Thus obviously, Cesar is evil. Then, the candy trainer solved the problem with candy, thus "proving" that candy works? Because apparently the concept of positive reinforcement needs proving?

More importantly, and I've said it before, positive reinforcement is one of four behaviour modifications techniques, thusly:

	I do something or give something	I stop doing something or remove something
to make you do something more often	Positive reinforcement	Negative reinforcement
to make you do something less often	Punishment	Extinction

Refer to this post if you need a clue. No one is claiming that positive reinforcement doesn't work, so you needn't waste your puny faculties proving it. But outside your little dream world of rainbow unicorns, there are still three equally effective mechanisms of behaviour modification, and you need all four of them. If you think you're using "only positive reinforcement", either you're not identifying the other three mechanisms, or you're not getting results.

Don't believe me? Let's look at the next time the candy trainer turned up on What Kind of Dog Hunts's blog. This time, the candy trainer had to deal with an aggressive dog. Candy didn't work, so she had the dog put down.

Er...

What?

So your favourite trainer has a dog put down that someone like, say, Cesar could have taken on, and you're still convinced that she's the bestest trainer ever and candy is the end-all and be-all of dog training? You're a fool. But we knew that already.

Meanwhile, on another blog, another anti-Cesar guy watched an episode where Cesar wore out an aggressive dog over the course of three hours. Three hours. Cesar triggered the dog, the dog attacked Cesar, Cesar controlled the dog. Then they did it again. And again and again and again. After three hours, the dog was too exhausted to fight anymore... and it was still alive. And no candy was harmed in the making of this episode.

So let's see. Cesar's way: live dog with a solution. Candy trainer's way: dead dog.

Hmmmmmmmmmmm...

Yeah: shows how smart you are.

What you're not getting here, in your little Care Bear world, is that Cesar works with aggressive dogs. "Aggressive" doesn't mean cutting in line or backstabbing at the office or whatever will get your silly little feelings hurt. Aggressive means a creature who attacks. Man, dog or horse, it's all the same. They attack, and they keep attacking.

One time I had an abusive boyfriend who yelled at me for 35 hours straight. Threats, insults, whatever. That is aggressive. Why didn't he also assault me physically? Because he knew he wouldn't get away with it; I'd have put him in jail for sure. Aggressive people, or dogs, attack when they're sure to win, not when they're sure to lose. Then one day the police had to come get him out of the house during a domestic. He attacked them, one against two cops, and laid a beating on them. One cop was injured. My ex was injured. I have PTSD. The cop also ranks it one of his nastiest experiences yet in law enforcement. They charged him with resisting arrest, he pleaded, and the judge was so incensed over the violence of his behaviour, he got 30 days with no priors. Because everyone could see the obvious: he's aggressive, and he's dangerous.

The great thing about it though, is that after that I never even had to raise my voice with him again. If he got fighty, I could say "don't you even start", and he'd leave the house and take his temper somewhere else.

What does that have to do with dogs? Because an aggressive dog, like an aggressive man, needs putting in his place. He needs to know beyond a shadow of a doubt that if he starts a fight, he's gonna lose. Bullying is a self-rewarding behaviour, they do it because they enjoy it. Therefore they don't do it if they know it's gonna get non-enjoyable. That's what the cops taught my ex, and that's what Cesar teaches aggressive dogs.

Can you teach the same thing with candy? Absolutely not. Try being nice to an abusive boyfriend and see where that gets you. The more you give them, the more you make them happy, the more they're enjoying themselves. And the more they're going to bully you. The more candy you give them, the more they're gonna expect candy from you, but that doesn't do anything to remove the rewards of bullying. Now the dog has two ways to get happy: manipulate you to get candy, or bully you just for fun. Yay you!

Candy works. Candy works on dogs who don't like brushing or who don't sit-stay too good. And winning a fight works on aggressive dogs. What Cesar does takes a lot of work and a lot of skill to be able to win those fights with minimum injury to himself or the dog. Granted it doesn't soothe your little Care Bear psyche with candy and rainbows, but you're not actually important in this question, because you don't even understanding the word "aggressive."

Other people have pointed out that Cesar gets bitten and what he does is dangerous and therefore he's wrong. Again, that's only true if reality is irrelevant to you. Yes, Cesar gets bitten. Yes, what he does is dangerous. And either he does it, or you can get the candy trainer to come put your dog down. And you know what, cops do dangerous work and get injured, and that doesn't mean we'd be better off to get rid of cops and just give criminals a lot of candy.

One more thing. One blogger said that at his or her house, they don't do Cesar, because they "don't need alpha rolls" with their dogs. Really? Well you know what, I bet Cesar would totally agree that you don't need alpha rolls. First of all because he doesn't even do them himself, and second because your dogs aren't aggressive and they don't need an aggression abatement program. When your dogs turn aggressive, you'll know the difference. So no, you don't need Cesar's top skills. But as far as not doing Cesar's way, you're wrong. Because I read your blog and you're fairly calm and assertive, and that is what Cesar is trying to teach you. Cesar never told you to go mano a mano with an aggressive dog. What he said for you to do is be calm-assertive, and walk your dog.

So again to summarize: Cesar works with aggressive dogs. Aggressive dogs can't be fixed with candy. But what Cesar told you to do isn't to wrestle with your dog because it won't sit-stay; what Cesar said is for you to be calm-assertive and walk your dog. So the problem isn't with Cesar, it's with you having no clue what Cesar said. And therein is one of the cornerstones of cognitive therapy: people hear exactly what they want to hear, and then everything they say or do based on something they made up is warped.

Straighten out your cognitions, then you'll understand what Cesar is talking about.

Why you shouldn't dock tails

Once upon a time, docking tails was done for some utilitarian reason which eludes me. But if you have a dog with a docked tail, that's not why. Your dog got docked because it's a tradition in that breed and you didn't ask yourself why on earth you'd want to do that. But the thing is, pet dogs need to have tails. Here's why.

Today on our afternoon walk, some bulldog-like creature attacked Tinky-Winky. And for once we have right on our side, because we were on leash and minding our own business, and the creature came running at us out of nowhere, with its people trying desperately to recall it. I don't even know who struck the first blow, because I didn't have time to turn around and look, but this dog was clearly on the attack. No dog means any good by coming at another at speed with erect body language anyway; if you're one of those people who call that "my dog is friendly", you're wrong. At best your dog is rude, and that's your fault, but if your dog is just rude and clueless, it will scream and run as soon as Tinky-Winky gives a warning snap. This dog dig not turn and run. She attacked, she got the upper hand immediately, and she kept attacking.

The bulldog's person later alleged that the dog "has never done that before," and I don't believe a word of it, because this dog knew exactly what she was doing. Dogs who don't fight don't know how to fight; they get thrown down and lie on the ground screaming in fear while the other dog bites them. This dog had all the same tricks Tinky-Winky has, and she was attacking. You don't have to know anything about dog fights to see when a dog attacks: it lunges and bites, trying to grab at the other dog, instead of retreating and trying to protect itself.

Now where this has anything to do with docking tails is, a bulldog has no tail. It also has no coat. And that's a very big problem when it's attacking something else, because the way to break up a dog fight is by grabbing the attacking dog's tail. First of all, it's the only thing that sticks out of the melee, and second, it's the part least likely to get bitten, therefore the safest place to grab them.

On that note, let me point out that pulling the defending dog away is the dumbest thing you can do. Idiot people with poofy little dogs always do that: let the dog run to the end of its stupid flexi-leash and get into a fight, and then pull on it over and over to try and fix things. How dumb do you have to be? Every time you pull on the leash, the dog is choking and is being jerked off its feet, plus, you're turning the dog's head towards you, leaving the tooth-less, eye-less, vulnerable rear end to face the attacking dog. Your dog is sure to get bitten and it's all your fault. But even if you grab the dog and pull it away by something other than its leash, the attacking dog is going to keep coming, so you haven't achieved anything unless you're able to lift your dog out of harm's way, which never happens.

No, obviously, to break up a dog fight, you have to control the attacking dog. And the way to do this is to grab it by the tail. And a bulldog has no tail, and therefore it's very difficult to stop it from attacking. So this is why you shouldn't dock your pet dog's tail. You have no practical use for that dog anyway, so it's not gonna be in its way, and when your dog gets into a fight, you'll need that tail to pull him out.

Now since I'm on the topic of dog fights, I'll point out something else: blood happens. BFD. Some people go into hysterics if there is any blood on their dog, and that's ridiculous. Especially because the hysterics usually come from the same people who bleed profusely once a month to begin with (hence the word "hysterics", of course). You'd think they'd be used to blood. Not only that, but I've bled more from a paper cut than the total amount of dog blood I've ever seen in fights in all my life. If there's blood on the dog, then there's blood on the dog. It's really not a big deal. And most of all, it's probably not even that dog's blood. Most of the time it's the attacker's blood, because the thing most likely to bleed in a dog fight is the attacking dog's tongue. Tinky-Winky came out of today's fight with blood all over her; both sides, her head, her feet, she had blood everywhere. And not a nick on her skin. The other dog bit her own tongue and bled on my dog, that's all.

And even if your dog does get cut in a fight, put some Bactine or Polysporin on it like you'd do for your kid, and get over it. Your dog isn't injured because it has a little blood on it. When your dog is injured, you'll see the difference.

So that's my rant for today. Don't dock tails, learn to break up a dog fight, and get over the sight of blood.

As for closure on my anecdote, after many tries I was able to grab the bulldog's collar and push her away, and as soon as she was under control, everything was quiet. Which shows again that the bulldog was the attacker, not my dog. If Tinky-Winky had been on the attack, getting the other dog an arm's length away wouldn't have made any difference.

Then I still had to wait for a while, with a dog in each hand, for the bulldog's people to catch up to her. Polite conversation was had, the source of the blood was investigated, and then we each went our separate way. And the dogs were in no way upset. And that's another thing people in our limp-wristed society fail to realize about dog fights: dogs like dog fights. Not all dogs, and not usually if they get their clock cleaned, but a fairly even dog fight where both dogs are fighters is like a bar fight among humans. It happens, it lets a lot of the piss and vinegar out, and it's often the least boring thing you'll do all weekend.

Seriously.

Muzzle: still fail

I thought I had solved the muzzle problem by creating a hand-tied one. After all, hand-knotted halters were very fashionable when I had a horse, why not a hand-knotted dog muzzle? Clearly it could use some fine-tuning, but if you really want to know, it's like this: first a bowline in the bight for an adjustable noseband, then the two ends are tied together in a Carrick bend at the back of the head; then the free ends are seized each to one standing line with a hangman's knot, and from there diagonally to the top of the noseband where they are tied together again with a Carrick bend, with the noseband seized through it; then the free ends go back through the hangman's knots and are stopped with a figure-eight.

At first the creature was unable to take it off, so she lay on the floor miserably pretending to be dead, like this:


As long as we're on the leash, she fights with the muzzle like a fury, but as soon as I let her off, she pretty much forgets about it and goes running around as she normally would. Yay, victory!

...

So I thought. It worked well for two days, and then she attacked a dog. For no particular reason, that I know. It wasn't even a small poofy dog. So she went at it a few times and then realized she couldn't bite, ran away, and lay down again in her "poor pitiful puppy" attitude.

When she came back a few minutes later, she had gotten the noseband off again.

Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaargh!

Fine. I put it back on and tightened it, and she ignored it for the rest of the walk. But the next day she saw a dog again, so she ran away, and came back with her muzzle undone again. I put it back on and she went to remove it right away, so I saw how she's doing it. She gets a claw under the side and pulls it across her nose. It squishes her poor little nose all out of shape, but she's motivated. And there is nothing else I can think of to stop the muzzle coming off that way. I don't even think a basket muzzle would stand up to it.

Blah. I thought finding out the muzzle stops her from biting would motivate her to quit fighting; instead it just motivates her to try harder to get the muzzle off. That's how determined she is to fight with other dogs.

This isn't a good thing.

Shiba: 3, human: 0

I thought I was ever so clever and bought a cat harness instead of a dog muzzle. Because really, if you turn it upside down, a cat harness looks exactly like the muzzle I want.

So I put it on the dog to try it out, adjusted so I can get a finger underneath in accordance with the Interwebs.

The dog didn't move. Just looked at me with an inscrutable look.

Then,

very calmly,

she took her evil little paw,

and wiped the muzzle off in one fell swoop.

Zut alors.

Ok, I tightened it and put it back on.

The dog didn't move, just looked at me with a longer, more inscrutable look.

Then she swiped at the muzzle and it didn't move.

"Victory!" I thought.

Ha.

In two tries, she got a claw under the muzzle and took it off again.

Crap.

Fine. I tightened it as much as I dared. She could still open her mouth, enough to lick her nose anyway. The strap sit close to her eyes so that gives her a bit of an angle at the toothy end.

So this time, she licked her nose, and then tried to take the muzzle off, and it stayed on.

She sat and thought about it for a while.

"Great," I thought, "she's just gonna get used to it."

Then she got up, walked away from me, put her head down, and I didn't even see how she did it, but she got the stupid thing off again.

Yaaaaaaaaaaaaargh!

Fine. I see what needs to be done, I think... I can put some side straps to run from about the 3 and 9 positions on the nose strap to the neck strap. Fairly low on the neck strap, so it's not in her field of vision, but high enough to stop the nose strap from pivoting. Only thing is, I don't have materials here in Yellowknife.

Just you wait till we get home, you wily one... I'll get you yet.

Why is this so complicated?

Here is the dog muzzle I want:



I can buy it from France for €14.99. Plus €47.99 for shipping and handling. Hmmmmmmmm... Not so much.

Or, here is the muzzle I can buy here in Canada:


What a sad design. Obviously any dog with half a brain will get it off in one move. Especially a short-necked dog like Tinky-Winky.

And of course by "here in Canada" I don't mean here in Yellowknife. Allegedly there's a pet store somewhere, but I'd have to look for it, and that means going out and driving around Yellowknife, and I'm not doing that.

Whatever. I'll just copy the French pattern myself. Save some money.

Tinky-Winky loses a privilege

First, back story. Tinky-Winky came to me labeled as "extremely dog-aggressive." And, she was. She would attack any dog that came in range, which is a lot of dogs because people are retarded and will let their dog run to the end of the flexi-leash and approach another dog even if I tell them "keep your dog away." And they'll be like "oh don't worry, my dog is friendly." Which isn't true, because that's not how a friendly dog acts, but that's a rant for another post. But the bigger point is, what kind of retard lets his dog approach another dog despite being warned not to?

So anyway, on leash, Tinky-Winky gets approached by a lot of stupid people's dogs, and when I first got her, she would attack so fast you didn't have time to blink, let alone pick her up. She would go for the jugular, no matter what size of dog, and not let go. I've had to pry her jaws open a few times to free another dog. One time, she was on leash, and a guy was walking two Doberman pinschers off leash. They came running up to us, and Tinky-Winky lunged at them so menacingly that they turned and ran away screaming, even though she didn't even touch either one of them. And that's a much larger breed that has a name for ferocity.

So, all that to say, Tinky-Winky was a serious problem. Even on leash, we could only walk quietly between 11 pm and 5 am when other people are indoors, or on the back road where all the aggressive dogs go. If she wasn't such a small dog she'd have been put down long ago. Four years later however, you wouldn't know it's the same dog. Turns out she's not an aggressive dog, she's a timid dog who figured the best defence is a good offence. Now that she figures the best defence is me, she just comes back to me when she's not comfortable with another dog. I can walk her off-leash with other dogs, I can have her visit at someone else's house, she'll even let another dog walk into our apartment and eat her food without saying boo. And she doesn't bark at the door anymore, either. Dog-whispering magic.

The only thing is, she still attacks small poofy dogs. Not smooth-haired dogs like Jack Russels; only poofy ones. She will go way the heck out of her way to go attack a small poofy dog. That's a problem.

So yesterday, as we were coming home from walking, she got distracted by two ravens who were eating popcorn in the Highrise parking lot, and then a small poofy dog walked out of the building on a flexi-leash.

Ah, crap.

Tinky-Winky left her popcorn and went to investigate. I tried to catch her and failed. Instead I kicked her in the hip as she went around me, and that also failed to distract her. She stopped about two feet from the other dog, who was pulling on his leash toward her, and they looked at each other, and then she attacked. And the stupid person who was with the poofy dog started screaming like a pig and pulled on her dog's leash, with the obvious result that her dog couldn't breathe, freaked out, and also was forced to turn his back to Tinky-Winky, so he got bit on his back. Obviously.

Not that this detracts in anyway from the fact that it was my fault for not controlling my dog, but a less stupid person would have a) not let her dog out to the end of its flexi-leash, b) not let her dog run out way ahead of her on the leash, c) brought her dog back to her when another dog showed up, d) picked her dog up, and/or e) at least let it defend itself.

Well, of course a non-stupid person wouldn't have been using a flexi-leash in the first place, but again, that's a rant for another post.

So, the poofy dog got bit on its back, and he's fine. The woman, on the other hand, screamed like a banshee, and decided to call the RCMP, like they give a frack about a dog fight at 6:00 pm on a Sunday night on private property. And since they indeed didn't give a frack, she thought it would be clever to tell them I was drinking and driving. Which is funny because first I don't drink, so she just cost herself any credibility she might previously have had with them, and second, they still didn't give a frack about the dogs. A cop came and found me, asked if I was drinking, declined to give me a breathalyzer, mentioned that I'd be civilly liable for any damage my dog might do, and went home to write his report.

The other reason it's funny is that I would have felt bad about the incident if she hadn't started screaming, somewhat less bad once she acted like an idiot, and not bad at all after she proved to be an evil bitch. Not that you expect any less from people in Hay River, mind you, but now I'm positively amused that she's upset.

Still, I'm not at all amused with Tinky-Winky, and since it's been 4 1/2 years and all her other behaviours are gone and she still attacks small poofy dogs, I'm rather out of solutions. Keeping her on the leash wouldn't help, especially as long as there are stupid people with flexi-leashes who let their dogs approach other dogs. She gets into more fights on leash than off anyway. And going back to ungodly hours and back roads doesn't suit me.

So, what's gonna happen is going back to Plan A: a muzzle. I had bought one for her a few years ago, and never ended up using it because she was improving so much. Since she doesn't seem to be improving anymore and she still can't be trusted, she can get the muzzle now. It will keep her from fighting, it will also keep her from eating gross stuff on the ground, and as an added bonus, maybe it will finally convince retarded people with flexi-leashes not to let their dogs approach her. For whatever reason, people believe a muzzle a lot more than a verbal warning.

The only downside of this plan is it's been so long, I have no idea where her muzzle is now, so I'm gonna have to buy a new one. That's rather a waste of money.

Reader question: how do you establish leadership?

Hmmmmmm...

That's a good question, Adam, and the answer is so long that a guy named Cesar Millan is making a good deal of money answering it, in books and on TV. I highly recommend him. If nothing else, read Cesar's Way. It explains exactly how to be the pack leader.

Seriously.

Just because he's famous, doesn't mean he's wrong.

Ok, so as for me answering the question briefly and for free, let me ask you this: how did your boss establish leadership over you?

Hmmmmm...

With mine, it went like this: the phone rang one day, and I pick it up and this guy says "hi, I'm The Boss from The Company." And you know what, he totally sounded like the boss.

So how he "established leadership" is that he told me he's the boss, and I believed him. That is all. And so it is with dogs.

Like I said before, leadership isn't something you "do", it's something you have. And it's especially not something you do vis-a-vis someone else, such as your dog. You, Adam, wrote:

"NOs" with the dog, pretending to be a dog and throwing your dog on its back and showing ur teeth while growling may do it for some things.

Well, you're right about that. It "may" do some things. It's got nothing to do with leadership, though. Seriously. How often does your boss say "NO!"? Does that work? Do you learn anything from your boss walking around saying "NO!" every so often? Do you even listen, or do you think he's a crazy jerk?

Well, probably your boss doesn't say "NO!". Because it doesn't achieve anything.

Rolling your dog onto her back? Either the dog thinks it's a game, or she realizes you're just throwing your weight around. Dogs aren't stupid; they know that a person eight times their weight and with opposable thumbs can put them on their backs. That doesn't mean they're giving anything to you psychologically. And in my work analogy, it would be kinda like the boss coming to your station and saying to you. "I'm bigger than you and you have to obey me! Because I'm the boss! Bahaha! I'm important! I have a big penis! My paycheque is huge! Kiss my ass, you meaningless grunt!"

Not really helpful.

As for showing teeth... I can't imagine why you'd want to show teeth to your dog. Showing teeth is a threat and it's serious. Tinky-Winky and I show teeth when a loose dog approaches our pack. If he keeps coming, we attack. And I do mean "we" attack. Tinky-Winky with her teeth, me usually just feinting at the dog, although I have in the past kicked a dog who had Tinky-Winky pinned to the ground and wouldn't let go. At least I was nice and kicked him in the hip, not in the belly, but I'm certainly not gonna back down from a dog fight if the other dog starts it. Showing teeth, usually, should prevent dog fights by adequately communicating "get out of here or you're gonna get messed up." If the dog doesn't clear out, it may become necessary to mess him up. So why would you show teeth at your own pack? I would never show teeth at Tinky-Winky, and she'd be in a world of trouble if she showed her teeth at me. But of course she doesn't. She has to be seriously mad to show teeth. Like I just said, it's the last thing before she attacks. And there isn't a lot of time between the warning and the attack, either.

Showing teeth is serious business. I wouldn't do it until you really mean it.

So... What do you do? You don't do. You are. You are the leader.

Being the leader means first of all one thing: you make decisions. As long as you're not making decisions, you're not leading anyone. So in your pack, you have to make the decisions. You, not the dog. If the dog tells you when it's time to feed her or walk her or play with her or where she's gonna sleep, she's making the decisions. She's the leader. You should be the one deciding all these things.

Now you might think that because your particular dog is a puppy and you're housetraining her, she has to tell you when she needs to go out.

Except she doesn't.

If you walk your dog often enough, she won't be giving you orders, and it will make her housetraining easier. My neighbour's basset never housetrained properly on three walks a day. She was two years old when my neighbour adopted her and not properly housetrained. So, I told the neighbour to walk her four times a day at regular times. Immediately, the dog was housetrained. It's not that she hadn't grasped the concept of holding her bladder, she just didn't really bother because she didn't believe she'd be walked before it was too late. Once she knew what time she was getting walked for sure, she'd wait for her walk. Likewise with your puppy. Take her outside regularly before she asks, so she knows two things: 1) there is a bathroom break coming before it's an emergency, and 2) YOU decide when the walks are.

Likewise with feeding. One book I read said "never ever free-feed a dog, or you won't be able to use food as a reward." First of all, that's nonsense on the reward part. More food is always welcome with a dog. And second, while it's not necessary to free-feed a dog, if you're not doing it, then you have to make sure you feed only on your own terms. Tinky-Winky gets a dish of home-cooked food once a day, after her evening walk, and she knows that. She's long since given up asking for an extra dinner by staring at the fridge. However, if she's hungry between meals, she always has Iams kibbles. She eats a little bit from her bowl of kibbles every day, and so she never bothers me for food. On the other hand, with our last set of roommates, there was an older woman, Barb, who was Tinky-Winky's slave. Tinky-Winky would lead her to the fridge, and when Barb opened it, Tinky-Winky would stick her head in and pick out whatever she fancied. Then Barb would grab whatever it was, unwrap it, and give it to her. Tinky-Winky never did that with any of the other roommates, and certainly not with me, but she knew it would work with Barb. Between the two of them, there was no question that Tinky-Winky was the leader.

So clearly, an important aspect of leadership is that in order to retain it, you have to make sure your pack's needs are met. As long as the pack has a full stomach thanks to you, they'll follow you. This is almost word for word in the Tao Te Ching, by the way. Keep the people's bellies full and they will be peaceful. More generally, make sure your dog has food, water, walks, chewies, beds, structure and affection, before she has to ask for them. Then she's not having to make her own decisions about when to eat, pee, fight another dog, anything.

Now with your particular case, Adam, because you have a puppy, it's somewhat necessary that she make her own decisions some times, as part of her development. So, she'll have to challenge you some of the time, as a teenager would. I'd say, just keep your cool about it. Be like a cat: pretend that was exactly what you meant to do.

And therein is another important point: be cool. Cesar calls it "calm assertive." You can call it whatever you like, but be cool. Always be cool. My neighbour with the basset used to be almost in tears whenever she opened her fridge because the dog would shove her out of the way, stick her head in the fridge, and refuse to be removed. I told her, just tie up the dog before you open the fridge. It won't teach her anything, but it will take away her power to make you cry.

So, don't let the dog get to you. And don't let the dog see other things get to you, either. If you're walking the dog and someone comes toward you with another dog, and you're getting all freaked out because there's gonna be a fight, the dog is gonna figure there must be a threat, because you're all freaked out, and he's gonna want to do something about it. Such as fight the other dog. So, if there's a dog coming, be cool. There won't be a fight. You can handle it.

Oh yeah, handling it. Because you're the leader, you have to handle things. With Tinky-Winky, quite often she'll want to put a dog in its place, and I think she's right. But because I'm in charge, I don't let her put the dog in its place. I have her sit, I put my arm around her, and then I tell the other dog where to go. Likewise if there is someone at the door, it's not for her to bark and defend our territory. I handle the person at the door. I'm the leader. It's my job.

Now one thing about all this leadership is, with dogs as with people, there is a big difference between a leader and a control freak. You don't need to control your dog's every move, you just need a generally obedient spirit, and to be in control of the situation. Between Tinky-Winky and me, some things are non-negotiable, such as barking at the door. We live in an apartment, so it's absolutely not an option for her to bark. Therefore, she does not bark at the door. And she was an absolutely obsessive door-barker when I got her. On the other hand, if I tell her to jump up on the bed at bedtime and she doesn't want to, I don't insist. It's not really important whether she sleeps on my bed or on her bed, so I don't get all controlling about it.

An aside about the door thing: again the "who's in charge" aspect has a role in that. If I'm home with her and someone comes to the door, Tinky-Winky says nothing, because I'm in charge. But if I'm in the shower and someone comes to the door, Tinky-Winky will give some warning barks, because she's figured out that I don't handle the door when I'm in the shower. So, being the good pack member she is, she has to make sure I know. And so I always make sure to answer her, so she knows I know.

Finally, an important trick I got from horse trainer Pat Parelli: "make the right thing easy and the wrong thing hard."

It works with people, horses, dogs, anything but cats, I think. Cats don't have a problem going way out of their way to do the wrong thing. But with dogs, it works. For example, about chewing. Many people leave their shoes on the floor and then have a fit because the dog ate them. Ok... Put your shoes in the closet, then. The dog isn't gonna take the time out of his day to grow thumbs, open the closet, find your shoes, and eat them. He'll just find something more convenient to chew on. And this is a particularly important one with puppies, as I found to my chagrin when I had puppies. I had two husky puppies, Scotland and Willow. When I got them, they were tiny and cute. They never ate a shoe, but they ate everything they found on the floor, such as the Yellow Pages. So, I learned to put everything up on shelves that the dogs couldn't reach. Sadly, I didn't account for the fact that puppies grow, so one day, the shelf where my leather wallet had always been safe came within the reach of Scotland, and so she ate my wallet and all my credit cards. Oops...

So yeah. Make it so it's inconvenient or impossible for the dog to do what you don't want, and easy to do what you do want. If you don't want the dog on your bed, have her sleep in a crate. If you don't want her to go into the bathroom and eat the toilet paper, keep the bathroom door closed (it's good feng shui anyway to keep bathroom doors closed). If you don't want her in the garbage, put your garbage in something she can't open, and take it out promptly when you've put something especially tempting in the garbage. Like say, the remains of a rotisserie chicken. You can't blame your dog for fighting her way to a rotisserie chicken through every door in your house, really.

So that's pretty much what I can think of about being the leader. In summary:

• Make the decisions.
• Ensure the pack's well-being.
• Be cool.
• Don't be a control freak.
• Make the right thing easy and the wrong thing hard.

And read Cesar's Way.

I hope some of this helps... Feel free to ask more questions, I'll do what I can to answer them.

Eentsy weentsy cold feet

In just a few days, the weather went from -10°C-ish to -40°C-ish. Tinky-Winky's feet didn't adapt. She always gets cold feet at the beginning of winter, and she refuses to wear boots, so she has to live with it.

Except... I can't very well let her sit on the -40°C snow and cry until she accepts the consequences of her choice not to wear boots. So, for the last few days, I've been carrying her instead of walking her. We start out walking, then her feet get cold and she cries, and I pick her up and carry her. Every once in a while I put her back down and see if she'll walk.

Of course it would be easier to stay home, except, she won't relieve herself anywhere close to the house. I kinda think the physical act of walking helps her move her bowel, but she also has a mental block about going close to home. So, for days, I've been carrying her ten minutes from the house, setting her down so she can poop, and carrying her back to the house. I'm not sure she understands that she has to go before I'll carry her back home. Some times she just starts crying again every time I put her down, instead of looking for a suitable place to poop. And even though this is her fifth winter up north, she still doesn't seem to understand that her feet hurt more if she tries to go in the deep snow. Or maybe her need for privacy when pooping is greater than the pain in her feet from the deep snow. Yesterday, in -38°C, she pooped in the deep snow while balancing precariously on two feet.

The other problem with all this is that she's already not getting enough walking in Yellowknife, let alone when all her "walking" consists in me carrying her to her bathroom spot and back. So, the lack of exercise really comes out in vastly multiplied dog aggression.

Fortunately, today is a lot warmer: -31°C. Warm, eh? Well, warm enough for her to do our routine walk on her own. So now she's all about more walking. Hopefully we can get in some decent runs this weekend to get some of the vinegar out of her, now that the piss is taken care of.

(Yes, I just wrote a long post about my dog's bathroom habits. And it's still more fun than reading about babies! Muwahaha!)

Mohandas Doggy

The place where the dog fight happened is on Gaetz Drive, and we walk through it every walk, so we had to go through there five times this weekend. The next walk after the fight, Tinky-Winky hesitated and looked carefully down the street as far as she could, and seeing there was no dog, she zoomed through where the fight happened. That's odd, in that it's the first time I've seen her show a memory of where she's had a fight.

The next walk, however, when she looked around the area, she saw a loose dog. Not the same loose dog, mind you, but she came running back to me. Well, fine, she's supposed to do that when there is a dog. I declined to put her leash on her and told her to just walk alongside of me. But no: she insisted on being picked up. Curiouser and curiouser... She only asks to be carried when she's hurting, usually from cold feet, or tired from too much walking. Yet, that was clearly not the problem. No, she insisted on being picked up, and looked anxiously back and forth between me and the loose dog.

Ok, I picked her up. And carried her past the loose dog, who was minding his own business. And she watched the dog the whole time. Once we were past the fight area, I set her down again, and she took off happily again.

Wow.

I'm so impressed that my dog would ask me to carry her to make sure she doesn't get in a fight. No, she's not an aggressive dog. She's a dog who attacks when she feels threatened. Like any other dog. All that's needed to keep her safe is to remove perceived threats.

Like mother, like daughter

Ok, so Tinky-Winky was in a more aggressive dog fight this weekend. A loose dog approached me while Tinky-Winky was away from me. She hates having another dog closer to me than she is, so that wasn't good. The loose dog actually had very good dog manners. He came up quietly behind me to sniff my butt, and when he saw I had a dog with me, he waited for her side-on and not looking at her directly.

Tinky-Winky approached straight, looking at him, with her ears up. Oops, that's bad. I asked her to desist, but no, she lunged at the other dog. Double oops: he's much bigger, and she's totally out of practice fighting. She used to be invincible even against bigger dogs. Now, not so much. He threw her down, she got back up and went at him again, and then I managed to grab his collar and ordered everyone to quit. And they did. And I wasn't even surprised. Cesar is right: if I'm in control, there is nothing for these two to fight about. Doesn't matter that I controlled the dog that's theoretically not under my control.

So, then I asked the loose dog to leave, which he did, and admonished Tinky-Winky, and resumed walking. She took a few steps and then came to sit down in front of me in her "please carry me" pose.

Hmmmm...

No.

I could see she was hurting somewhere, because she was holding her head funny, but she obviously not mortally wounded, and she started it, so, no sympathy. I told her as much, too. "You had no business starting that," I told her. "That dog was being polite. I'm not going to cuddle you for starting a fight."

However much of that she understood, she took off on our regular path again, still holding her head funny. Once we got home, I looked at her, and it appears she got her ear bit. Not much, but dog ears bleed quite a bit, so she looked somewhat worse off than she was. I wiped the blood and put some Bactine on the bite, and then I petted her and cuddled her.

On the one hand, it's not funny, and of course puncture wounds are apt to get infected, blah blah blah.

And on the other hand, it's somewhat funny, first because she needs putting in her place when it comes to fights. The more fights she loses, the more she thinks twice about trying again. But more importantly, because if I'm not mistaken, her mother was never shown due to losing an ear in a dog fight at a young age. And her grandmother, though nearly blind and deaf by now, makes a daily habit of antagonizing a Newfoundland dog on her street.

Still, I hope to get one of her bloodline when she passes away.

Funniest dog fight ever

I should mention that Tinky-Winky came to me labelled as an "aggressive" dog. After four years of working on her "aggression", it's come to my attention that she's actually a fearful dog who figures the best defence is a good offence. When she feels threatened, she attacks. Over the years, we've greatly reduced her perception of what's a threat, and also we've developed a procedure. When she sees a dog approaching and she's not sure she's comfortable, she comes back to me and sits. Then I hold her and deal with the other dog until its owner can control it.

The only problem we run into is that what Tinky-Winky considers threatening is what other dog owners call "friendly." Tinky-Winky is right, of course. A dog who comes running at a strange dog like a bat out of hell, making eye contact and getting into her personal space without introductions, isn't being "friendly": it's being unbalanced and extremely rude. Most of the time, she'll put those dogs in their place with a warning snap. The owners pout, but they know they're at fault for not controlling their dog, so they shut up.

Anyway, on to my anecdote.

Tonight on our walk, a dachshund in a parka came running at us like a maniac, barking frantically. Tinky-Winky lunged at him and there was some barking, snapping and growling, before I restrained her. Then she sat and was quiet for a little bit, but the dachshund kept barking and feinting at her, and she was getting upset. In fact, she was starting to snarl, and when Tinky-Winky gets snarly, someone's cruising for a bruising. Of course any normal dog would know a snarl means just that, and it's pretty weird that I understand dog language better than a dachshund, but that's the way people raise their dogs, sadly.

At this point the dachshund's owner finally caught up with her dog and restrained him, apologized profusely, and then, I'm not sure what her reasoning was, but she turned her dog around and offered his butt to Tinky-Winky, with the idea that Tinky-Winky would sniff it and be reconciled with the creature.

O... K...

So that was socially awkward, both by dog standards and human standards, but Tinky-Winky, after a moment's thought, resolved the awkwardness with characteristically decisive action: she bit the other dog's butt. With great enthusiasm, might I add.

The dachshund squealed and squirmed. Tinky-Winky sat back down with me. And the other owner and I just about killed ourselves laughing. It was so unexpected, under-handed and yet so aptly canine.

Tinky-Winky, clearly, felt that the situation was adequately closed, and we walked away without her looking back. The dachshund jumped into the vehicle he had previously refused to get into, whereat the owner said "oh, you're listening to me now are you?" We wished each other a good night with the greatest good will and fellowship. And I kept on giggling as I followed my dog.

Dog aggression isn't funny... but some times, it is.